Stress and learning

I am sort of a “learning research junkie”—I’ll read pretty much anything about all the new research into how our brains learn—and don’t learn. When I was working on my book, my publisher sent me pretty much any book that they thought might be of interest to my audience. I read all of them. I don’t expect other people to have the time or interest to read them all, but I do think that all parents—especially homeschooling parents—should be aware of some of the most important aspects of how the brain learns. (I’ll suggest some resources at the end of this piece.)

It’s important to understand how brains do learn if you want to recognize a situation in which your child can’t learn. First of all, brains are bundles of connections. When we’re very small, our brains suck in everything we experience and set up a scaffolding that everything they learn later is built on. This is why they say that the first few years are so critical.

Our brains are very badly engineered to learn isolated facts. In fact, most people can only remember a string of random words up to about 7 words long. People who make a hobby out of entering memory competitions learn to memorize unconnected pieces of information by connecting them with things already in their memory (see my recommendation for Moonwalking with Einstein below). The result is that no matter what else is learned about how we learn, the most important aspect of learning is connections.

The second thing to realize is how interconnected the different parts of our brains are. We tend to compartmentalize the brain when we describe it: “this is the part where we feel emotion” and “this is the part where we use logic.” This implies a separation more definitive than is really the case. Researchers have scores of examples of people who have overcome losing an area of their brain due to disease or injury and rewiring other areas of the brain to do what the lost area used to do.

Also, and more importantly, everything you try to do with your brain is affected by the other parts of your brain. So we might try to assert that kids should be able to learn when they are physically or emotionally uncomfortable, because those things “don’t have anything to do with learning.” But in fact, they have everything to do with learning.

I read an excellent article by Judy Willis (author of Inspiring Middle School Minds) on the challenges faced by twice-exceptional learners. But whether or not your child is 2e, Willis offers some important information about stress and its effect on the learning brain. (The full article can be found in this month’s Gifted Education Communicator, which is by subscription only.)

When your child is learning, all input is first filtered through the amygdala, which is in the emotional response center of the brain. Wait: an algebra problem goes through the emotional response center first? Yes: algebra, the color of the water in a pool, the sound of you asking your child to come out of her room, the history of the late Roman Empire, and instructions for when to take out the garbage all get filtered through your child’s emotional center first.

When your child is relaxed and happy, here’s what happens next:

In the absence of high stress, fear, or perceived threat, the amygdala directs incoming information to the prefrontal cortex (PFC). There the information is further evaluated by the brain’s high-order thinking networks as to meaning and relationships to stored memories of previous experiences.

In other words, the information comes into your child’s brain and is connected within existing connections, where it can become part of permanent memory.

But what about when your child is upset and stressed out by what you’re trying to work on? When the amygdala senses stress, it sends all information—no matter what it is—directly into the flight-or-fight center of our brain instead of the areas of the brain that process meaning. According to Willis:

Unfortunately, the human amygdala cannot distinguish between real or imagined threats. Whenever the amygdala is highly activated by negative emotions, it sends incoming information to the lower, involuntary, quick-response brain, where the behavioral reactions are limited to the primitive fight/flight/freeze survival mechanisms. (Gifted Education Communicator, Winter 2012)

I think it’s pretty obvious what this means regarding stress and learning: When you are stressed out, it’s like trying to do a handstand in a straitjacket. You might seem like you’re learning, but the information that’s going in is hitting a wall.

This of course has huge implications for educational policy: no wonder kids in rough neighborhoods aren’t doing well in school. It won’t help to dock the teachers’ pay, fire all the staff, and make stiffer rules. Their friends are getting shot, their parents are AWOL, and their siblings are running with a bad crowd. How do you expect a brain to take in algebra in that situation?

For homeschoolers, the implications are a bit different: We have actual choices each day in what to do. We are not teachers who have to follow a protocol.

I know so many homeschoolers—and I include myself here as well—who forget that we can back off and choose a different way anytime we need to. If math is stressful for your child this week, skip it. If it takes a month before you sense willingness to try again, let that month happen. Watch silly videos about math instead of trying to do problems. Let your child dictate all the math while you write on a whiteboard. Do math while your child is on a swing. Chop your learning times into 15-minute energy windows.

If your child hates to write, don’t force her to write book reports. Dictate silly stories about her darkling beetle. Write limericks. Read, read, read, and read some more. Talk about everything. Ask questions. Answer questions. Take my advice about teaching writing. Take Patricia Zaballos’s advice about teaching writing. But whatever you do, remember that if writing causes your child stress, good writing will not happen.

The beauty of homeschooling is flexibility. In times of homeschooling stress, I hope we all remember that there is always another path to get where we are going. Like water going down a hillside, sometimes the easiest path is the best one to take.

Resources:

  • This book is specific to gifted middle schoolers, but I think its message is applicable to all kids in that age range: Inspiring Middle School Minds by Judy Willis. Willis’s website has further articles: http://www.radteach.com/ Check out her Parent Tips.
  • Moonwalking with Einstein by Joshua Foer: Foer explores memory, and destroys the illusion that some people are exceptionally “smart” because of their prodigious memories. As you read, you will really come to understand why “linked” memories are so important to your child’s learning.
  • KidLab: I heard Dr. Kalbfleisch speak at NAGC and was impressed with both the depth and breadth of her knowledge and also her ability to talk to an audience of non-scientists. The site has links to articles and interviews.
  • The Eide Neurolearning Blog is full of great ideas about learning.
  • Find more links on my Gifted Links page.

Facebook thinks I speak Spanish, and other musings about modern life

Hola…

For months now I have been getting e-mails from Facebook, recommending I add as friends people I have never met. People whose first language is Spanish. People who don’t even live in the same country as me.

OK, I speak passable caveman Spanish. I can read and understand, but when I go to speak, all I can think is French. Or German. Or how to say “hello” in Thai. I think they call this tongue-tied.

Also, I do have some friends—as well as some “friends”—who speak Spanish. A few whose native language is Spanish. But when Facebook, a mindless machine made by men (and women, except they are not alliterative), keeps sending you recommendations for Spanish speakers you have no connection with, you’ve got to wonder.

What you wonder is up to you.

It’s HOMEschool…

I am just about to start my first online teaching experience. Two (or is it three?) professions ago, I was a college English teacher. I could never decide what to get a PhD in, so I could never get a tenured position, so I eventually gave it up for graphic design. But I never loved graphic design, which paid the bills, the way I loved teaching, which didn’t.

Luckily, I became a homeschooler. The cool thing about homeschooling is that you get to be many of the things that no one would ever pay you to be. Like, once I did dissections of frogs with my kids. Let me assure you, no one would pay me to be a biology teacher. We had fun, though.

So now, into the sixth year of homeschooling, I get to go back to my original love, teaching English. But the cool thing is, I don’t have to find a bunch of people in my same area, find a place for us to meet, and hope that we’ll all get there every week. Instead, I’m renting an online classroom and we’ll see how it goes.

I just had a piece accepted by the wonderful Life Learning Magazine about how homeschoolers can use the Internet with an emphasis more on the HOME than on the SCHOOL. In no way am I going to run my online class like a high school lit class. In fact, high school lit classes were why I decided never to take a literature class as an undergrad. But the cool thing is, we’re all going to be HOME. It’s hopefully going to integrate fun conversation and thoughtful interaction with our home environment. Oh, yes, we’ll probably get together physically if we can once during the year, but the rest of the time, we’ll be able to find each other online.

Internet Day…

OK, online class sounds great, but the other day my son had an experience that is completely new in this day and age. When we were kids, my husband and I had “snow days” when the snow hadn’t been plowed before it was time for the buses to go out. (Me more than him – I remember the thrill of listening to the radio station and hearing the name of my town in the list. Since it was a relatively wealthy town, we had a dismaying number of snow plows ready to get us to school.) Well, once in my son’s life there has been a snow day: when he was attending a school at the top of Mount Madonna in Santa Cruz County.

But now he’s got a claim his dad and I can’t match: He had an Internet Day yesterday! His algebra teacher’s Internet connection was down. Ten minutes after class should have started, I got a phone call (from “Wireless Caller”, doncha just love that caller I.D.?). His teacher asked if we could let all the students know what happened.

And I was brought back to the days of crowding around the radio at breakfast time.

“Yes!! Snow Day!” we’d all yell, and we’d put on our gear to go out sledding or grab a game to play with a sibling or grab that book we thought we were going to have to leave behind all day…

When I told my son, he didn’t react like that. Just a slow smile. “Bonus!” he was probably thinking. “Internet Day.”

Next time he’s waiting for his teacher and the phone rings, it’s going to be like when I was a kid and I woke to a newly quiet and snow-padded world. Fire up that radio. What’s a radio, Mom?

Dr. Who?…

My husband has been initiating our daughter into the world of Dr. Who. Now, between our two kids, you’d probably peg my son as the potential Dr. Who fan. But like his mother, he has too little patience with sitting in front of an image he can’t manipulate. But my daughter is loving it. She and her father are starting to make Dr. Who puns to each other and give each other knowing looks when her brother and I don’t know what they’re talking about.

When my son was younger, a family member of mine accused me of making him a social misfit.

“If he doesn’t watch bad TV, what’s he going to talk to his friends about?” he asked.

I’m proud now to know that at least one of my children will be able to have a conversation about a TV show. Even if it is a TV show that happened before she was even ovulated.

eAvoidance…

Right now, I’m supposed to be balancing our financial records. This is not a task I relish, though each year, it gets easier and easier. Pieces of paper are only occasionally involved in this task nowadays. Magically, I download my credit card charges and they match the ones on the PDF I see on my screen. Magically, money that doesn’t actually exist moves from one account to another, from our account to PG&E.

Being a modern home engineer qualifies one for all sorts of jobs that didn’t exist when we were kids. Perhaps if I need to, I’ll be able to sell my skills for avoiding household accounts while running an online class when the weather report threatens a Comcast outage of extreme proportions.

It’s all in a day in the life.

Books featuring homeschoolers

Like other kids, homeschoolers can be inspired by seeing themselves in fiction. The problem is that many of the depictions of homeschoolers in mainstream fiction depend on misinformation and depict homeschoolers as two-dimensional. The books on this list all show more well-rounded depictions of homeschool life.

Some of them are older books from before the time when homeschoolers were considered unusual. Many are more recent, positive depictions of kids living modern homeschooling lives. Please leave other suggestions in the comments below. (I haven’t read all of these, so let me know if any don’t belong on this list.)

Hanna
My book, Hanna, Homeschooler, follows seven-year-old Hanna as she moves to a new town and makes new friends.

Young Readers (picture and chapter books):

Books about homeschoolers
“Please excuse my child from school. I’m a vampire, and she might be one, too.”

Middle Grade (8-13 years):

  • Almond, David: Skellig
  • Atkinson, Elizabeth: I, Emma Freke
  • Baranoski, Sheila: Cellular Spirits
    Eric Achak is a twelve-year-old unschooler who can see ghosts. He thinks he’s the only one who has this problem until he meets Mr. Francis, who not only can see them but has developed a ghost-catching app that sucks ghosts into cell phones.
  • Barnhill, Kelly: The Girl Who Drank the Moon
  • Bodett, Tom: Williwaw!
  • Burnett, Frances Hodgson: The Secret Garden
    Not really a book about homeschooling, but children in Victorian Britain didn’t always go to school, and it never seemed to be such a huge issue, as long as they were learning and thriving.
  • Cook, Kacy: Nuts
  • Cottrell-Bentley, Lisa: Wright on Time series (click here for all books published by Lisa’s company, Do Life Right, which focuses on books about homeschoolers)
  • Forester, Victoria: The Girl who could Fly
  • Frank, Lucy: The Homeschool Liberation League
  • French, S. Terrell: Operation Redwood
    The homeschool family in this book is just a tad stereotypical (back to the land hippies), but they are lovely characters and as role models, impeccable.
  • Hannigan, Katherine: Ida B… and her plans to maximize fun, avoid disaster, and (possibly) save the world
  • Hatke, Ben: Mighty Jack
  • Hawes, Louise: Big Rig
    This is the very best depiction of roadschooling I’ve ever read in a kids’ book, hands down. On the homeschooling front, I absolutely can’t fault this book—4 stars, 2 thumbs up. However, I only recommend this book with reservations. I have serious concerns about letting kids think that a teen girl hitchhiking alone at a truck stop would end up OK. And a book about trucking that doesn’t point out its contribution to the climate crisis at this point seems really dated. So… lots of great conversation for homeschoolers here! But I wouldn’t recommend it as solo reading lest your kid think that girls who frequent truck stops and try to sweet talk truckers are not making a (dangerous, illegal) business of it.
  • Key, Watt: Alabama Moon
  • Kilbride, Susan: Our America series
  • Kleinman, Liza: Azalea, Unschooled
  • Korman, Gordon: Schooled
  • LaFevers, R.L.: Theodosia and the Serpents of Chaos
  • Law, Ingrid: Savvy
  • Leali, Michael: The Civil War of Amos Abernathy
    Two boys—one homeschooled the other in school, one in a conservative church and one in a liberal church—are gay. When they meet up in a historical reenactment park, their friendship helps them learn more about history and about themselves.
  • Mass, Wendy: Every Soul a Star
  • Morpurgo, Michael: Kensuke’s Kingdom
  • Palacio, R.J.: Wonder
    I love this book but recommend it with reservations: Homeschooling has clearly not harmed the main character, who is smart, well-educated, and socialized (as well as a boy with a scarily deformed face can be socialized). But the references to homeschooling are somewhat negative in that they imply that because his mother is “not good at fractions,” she can’t homeschool him anymore. Heck, you don’t have to be good at fractions to homeschool kids anymore, especially if you have enough money to send them to private school! I say read it with your kids and ask them whether they think homeschooling was depicted fairly.
  • Patterson, James: Treasure Hunters
  • Peterson, Stephanie Wilson: Nellie Nova Takes Flight
  • Riordan, Rick: The Kane Chronicles (starts with The Red Pyramid)
  • Selden, George: The Genie of Sutton Place
  • Selznick, Brian: Wonderstruck
  • Stead, Rebecca: Liar & Spy
  • Tolan, Stephanie: Surviving the Applewhites and Applewhites at Wit’s End
  • Wheeler, Patti: Travels of Gannon and Wyatt
Like many gentlemen of his era, young Victor Frankenstein was homeschooled.

Young Adult (13+):

  • Carter, Ally: I’d Tell You I Love You, But Then I’d Have to Kill You
  • Hubbard, Susan: The Society of S
    I enjoyed this book, which is quite well-written. The main character is the daughter of a vampire and a human who is kept in 19th-century style seclusion due to her “condition”—she may be a vampire like her father. Her father is distant but loving and she gets a fine classical homeschool education. Although the theme of this book is lovely—finding family and love—it does contain some grisly murders and wouldn’t be appropriate for younger kids.
  • Johnson, J.J.: This Girl Is Different
  • Lee, Harper: To Kill a Mockingbird
    I reread this recently and I was surprised to see that Atticus and his brother “never went to school.” Atticus is a lawyer, his brother is a doctor. When Scout first goes to school, the teacher tells her that “your daddy taught you wrong” because she could already read. Scout is mighty confused at this, as she could read for as long as she could remember. Not a book about homeschooling, but the message about the damage that school and bad teachers can do is loud and clear.
  • Mull, Brandon: Beyonders: A World Without Heroes
  • Oppel, Kenneth: This Dark Endeavor and sequels
    I have only read the first of this series. It portrays young Victor’s education as rather more lacking than the original Frankenstein (see Shelley below). It’s not anti-homeschooling, but it does point out the problem that can arise when a parent simply isn’t interested in an entire field of study and doesn’t guide his son’s studies in that area.
  • Rudnick, Paul: It’s All Your Fault
  • Shelley, Mary: Frankenstein
    Similar to The Secret Garden, this book hearkens back to a time and place when schooling was not the only way to learn. Young Victor Frankenstein and his cohorts do OK, though Victor does have a bit of a problem with the question of whether it’s moral to create a new life and then abandon it. Apparently, Daddy forgot to teach that high school class on ethics.
  • Sloan, Holly Goldberg: I’ll Be There
  • Spinelli, Jerry: Stargirl

Book list for pre-teen gifted readers

Pre-teen gifted readers often run into a problem around the age of ten: as younger children they read everything in children’s literature that they could get their hands on. By the time they reach ten years old, they’re starting to run into roadblocks when looking for appropriate books. Some ten-year-olds are ready to go on to Young Adult fiction, but most aren’t. Young Adult, with its focus on teens’ changing bodies and questioning of their place in the world, is often inappropriate and sometimes very upsetting for “tweens” who have outgrown children’s books but are looking for meaty reading to satisfy their literary cravings.

The list below contains books recommended for this demographic. In general, recommended books will not contain violence described in a visceral way, though books that very sensitive readers might want to avoid are starred. If you have recommendations for this list, please leave them in the comments below.

See also:

Resources:

Reading list for your gifted young reader

There is a lot of understanding these days about finding appropriate books for emerging readers. An entire new genre has even sprung up for struggling older readers who want something more mature than Amelia Bedelia. But there’s a problem on the other side of the spectrum for kids who read early. It’s not uncommon for an early reader to reach five years old and hit a wall: a lack of books at a higher reading level that are still appropriate for a five-year-old. Even though these children may be able to read Harry Potter, they may not be ready for the Young Adult intensity of the later books in the series.

The following books have been vetted by moms with children in this age group who are voracious readers. Asterisks denote books that may have difficult content for very sensitive readers. If you have additions, please leave them in the comments below. But make sure that the additions follow these rules:

  • No direct violence
  • If deaths of parents, pets, siblings or others are mentioned, please add a note
  • Complex enough reading for a five-year-old reading at a higher level

List:

See also:

Resources:

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