The definition of “success” is “the accomplishment of an aim or purpose.” Easy, right?
The connotation is much harder to explain, though.
What’s a connotation?
Google tells me that a connotation is “an idea or feeling that a word invokes in addition to its literal or primary meaning.” What the heck does that mean?
It means that every word in every language comes along with a little virtual suitcase of alternative meanings, ideas, situations, stories, and histories that you may or may not know.
In English, “success” has a suitcase big enough to hold an elephant and then some!
Success and “other people”
In the United States, people’s idea of success often comes from what other people think. And other people usually notice what they can see and measure. So in this case, people think success is:
* money
* fame
* prizes
* top scores
Success and you
The thing is, you aren’t other people. You are you. So you might think those things are important.
But you might not.
What could be more important to you than money, fame, prizes and getting a higher SAT score than all your friends?
Happiness
The one thing that all people actually want in common is happiness. But happiness is totally different for every single human being on this planet.
Imagine these two scenarios:
Kid A is really happy! There was a big blizzard and Kid A is stuck in the house with nothing to do but read. Wow! Yay!
Kid B is miserable! There was a big blizzard and Kid B is stuck in the house with nothing to do but read. Lemme out of here!
If success comes from happiness and happiness is different for everyone….
…then success is different for everyone. Look back at that success list: it assumes that everyone is the same. But we aren’t. Let’s look at different values that might lead people to view traditional markers of “success” differently:
money
One of us loves programming and hopes to found a successful startup. The other thinks the most fulfilling thing is to help the poor. We both achieve success if we achieve happiness through doing what we love—regardless of how much money we make.
fame
One of us likes to work behind the scenes. The other likes to go out and be a leader in our community. We both achieve success if we achieve happiness through doing what we love—regardless of how famous we get.
prizes
One of us loves to do things where there are opportunities to win prizes, such as math competitions. Another thrives doing “all guts, no glory” type of work. We both achieve success if we achieve happiness through doing what we love—regardless of whether we get a prize for it.
top scores
One of us loves to work hard to achieve the top scores, and feels great when we do it. The other just isn’t interested in activities that have scores and would rather have time to go to the beach. We both achieve success if we achieve happiness through doing what we love—regardless of how others would score the value of what we do.
Success is important
The important thing is not whether others define what you do as successful. The important thing is that you are happy and feel successful in your pursuits. If you feel horrible about not getting good grades, then you aren’t successful. But if you let your grades slip one semester so you can do volunteer work that’s important to you, that is a different sort of success.
Your job is to learn enough about yourself that you can find a way to be productive, chase happiness, and feel successful no matter what other people think.
